Sunday, June 19, 2011

Daddy's Little Girl!

"Anyone can be a father but not every one can be a dad."
In his element...
I remember late 2007, I was fortunate enough to be in Nigeria to celebrate my parents 30th wedding anniversary. I came across a bookmark at Heathrow airport earlier that year that had the line quoted above on it and it definitely got me thinking. My relationship with my father has been what I'd like to call "special." Growing up, we never really connected- He was always traveling and well, I spent the most part of my life in boarding school, so there was never really any chance to bond. I remember being scared of him just because he had that military background. Every time I asked for something, he'd yell. Not because it was his intention, but that's just how he was. I think that "male ego" had a role to play as well. As you can imagine, I never really asked for stuff. I'd call my mom in London, while he's sitting right there beside me, and ask her to tell him to give me some money. Yeah! It was that deep. Things began to change as all of us grew older. I think it's one of those inevitable things that happen where we are faced with the reality that we're all we've got.
I spent about 3 months with my dad that same year, and I must say that was the longest we'd ever spent together since I was 5. It was good. We learned more about each other- he began to understand me as 'the only girl' and was curious about what my future plans were. We laughed more times than expected. It was the beginning of better things to come.
Late 2008, my brother passed away. My dad's shell cracked and he became someone I did not recognize for a while. It's amazing what death can do to someone. My dad changed, I changed... It was a period of evolution, as I'd like to call it. While he began to realize how much he did NOT know about my brother, I began to realize how much I did not know about him. My brother's death broke every one of us in the family. There are no words to describe the entire episode...I don't think there'll ever be perfect words. What I know is, it was also a period of rebirth. My dad began to take time to understand us, to listen, and to care. Mind you, that is not to say he never cared before. This ...This was just DIFFERENT!
The bottom line is I watched this man turn into a dad...a REAL dad. The amount of pride I have just because he is my father is insurmountable. The numerous ways in which he continues to make sacrifices for me leave me overwhelmed. It's not easy! Despite there being no guarantee of what the future holds, or him being able to provide for me, he still encourages me to dream... and DREAM BIG!
I wish there were more words to express how much I love this man.  
My #1 dad
And to my brothers too... They played a role in raising me and moulding me into who I am today, especially knowing how to watch out for those NONSENSE men out there. Lol! For real though, I applaud them. 

My men!

So here's wishing a HAPPY FATHER'S DAY to all the REAL men out there who continue to make sacrifices and fulfill their roles as fathers, brothers, uncles...etc. And to the mothers who played that "father" role to their children. GOD BLESS YOU ALL!! You are indeed appreciated.

Have a GREAT week!!

Chocolate Kisses


  1. Awww...that's a great tribute. My condolences on the loss of your brother....